[He doesn't know what to do what any of that. Of having to relive his own moment of pain - of the whiplash from going to the truly deepest burning hatred of Kray Foresight that's possible, to the vision of him as savior, grateful. He feels nauseous. Not from how Galo feels, just the turn of it is too much all at once, and he doesn't know what to do with the information. The understanding. He's still being held by the waist, and he isn't going anywhere, so he just stays there. Eyes closed, letting out one shaking breath after the other, until it passes.]
[He's less speaking to Lio, and more crying out the name, desperately, desperately sad. It piles on him, as he watches this horrible memory, feeling every ounce of Lio's helplessness. And his own memory is no better. It's his most treasured memory, in so many ways, the one he returned to time and time again. Kray saved him, he's here thanks to Kray. But now, he can only think of Lio and his friends, suffering and in pain. And that horrible, hate-filled look on the Gov's face as he sent him off to die.
Why did the man who saved him do such awful things? And does he still care so much? He lost everything except for this one thing he gained, that he could latch onto, and he's lost that now, too. And gained Lio, but it feels like he can't possibly deserve to cling to Lio that tightly, not when he's sat back and let such terrible things happen to him. He lets his tears roll openly down his cheeks and continues to hold him by the waist, against his chest, but his grip is loose.]
[ Lio doesn't move away. He doesn't cry either, because he doesn't know how to - doesn't want to feel the depths of that grief again right now, tearing open the wound again. At least this time he doesn't feel as alone. Galo is here, and he trusts him, feels almost better knowing that someone can shed tears about it. Galo is holding on loosely, but Lio pulls in tighter, forehead against his chest, arms moving to circle his waist back and holding him there.]
[That only makes him want to cry even more. He hasn't had a person who will hold him back even if he doesn't cling with everything he's got in a long, long time.
He doesn't cry harder, though. He swallows back his tears, leaning into him.]
[He still hasn't figured out why he believes everything Galo says so deeply and immediately. He simply trusts him on instinct, believes that he believes what he is saying. He doesn't say anything in response to that, but he does nod, still pressed against his chest.]
[Well. He doesn't know what else to say, or how else to reassure Lio, or how to be a good middle school boyfriend. So he just holds him for a little while.]
[S'alright. Lio isn't really looking for any words. Maybe just experiencing some Emotions together upgraded them to high school boyfriends. Eventually he pulls back from the first actual hug he's gotten here, and in a long time, pulling him by the hand so they can at least sit down somewhere. He hasn't cried or anything, but his face his a little red in that way you get when emotions ride high. Threatening, but the dam doesn't break.]
[He swallows, considering. He sort of wants to protest - I don’t see him that way. But. Lio is trying to understand, right?]
Yeah. That’s how he first got famous - he was only a student, but he rescued me. And then his research started getting attention. Most people know about that even if they don’t put together that the kid was me, so I thought you also. . .
[He trails off, shaking his head.]
He kept up with me for a long time after that, too. He helped me get into training, and he recommended me for Burning Rescue. So I always saw him as my hero.
[ Lio doesn’t know about jail or Kray telling Galo he’d wished he’d just die. He only knows the portion where Galo decided he wasn’t going to follow him any more - but it’s obvious that was a painful enough decision. Squeezing the hand he’s holding. ]
You didn’t know. You are far from the only person he’s manipulated - you are one of the few brave enough to look the truth in the face.
[He doesn’t exactly feel brave? It’s just what he had to do. He was so gullible. He was used so much. It hurts when someone tries to make that out to be a good quality when it’s only painful to think about. But he still accepts it from Lio. From Lio, it doesn’t sound like damning him with faint praise. It feels like forgiveness.
He nods.]
That’s why I didn’t want to hear it from you, even though I have fucking eyes and I saw the people you were with, what condition they were in.
I’m glad you told me anyway, though. I’m glad you tried.
[ It is forgiveness - he no longer cares what Galo did or didn’t believe before. The only thing that matters is now, and right now he’s the person he trusts to do the right thing. No matter what. He’s missing fingers for proof enough of that. ]
[ That’s only like the forth time they’ve kissed and it’s already pretty natural. That should be weirder than it is.
When Galo says he understands, Lio sighs out - actual relief. That it’s actually good to finally be heard about that instead of lectured. Anyone who’s seen it seems suddenly scared of him. Acting disappointed he’d feel that depth of rage, that he’d threaten lives, that he’s supposed to be better. Hardly anyone had heard what he really meant - that he felt he had no other options. ]
Yeah. I mean, I still can't let you burn the city down, but that just means I'll have to come up with a better plan to free everybody. And I will.
[He's thought about this idea a lot recently. On the one hand, that awful experience of Kray brought him here angry and unwilling to consider people's arguments that some type of cruelty is the only good option. Those arguments only remind him of Kray, and he won't accept that. On the other hand, everyone here has had to make bad choices. He's starting to learn it's no use judging those choices if he can't think of a better one.]
[He hums a response, but he's mostly just looking at him now. He knows they are talking about extremely serious things and having serious feelings, but the way Galo is promising to help him and being very inspiring is . . . he would like to make out with him right? Looking at him, in that intense way he does.]
[Looking back, equally intense. Yes, he would also like that, but for the moment he's making out with his eyes. It seems like after he just made a cool declaration, it's Lio's job to decide whether it earned a kiss?]
[Yeah, okay, fine, it earned one. It was a pretty cool declaration! He'd like to kiss him about it, so, doing that. They are sitting on his chaise lounge that is cut open and stuffed with hoarded food, so, probably not the most comfortable locale.]
[Oh, good. He really thought he deserved a kiss for that. He doesn't care how uncomfortable this chair is, anyway. He's just winding his hands in the fabric of Lio's shirt.]
mods if you are reading this then you're nasty perverts DO NOT LOOK
[Well, Galo, when you opened up the emotional can of worms, you accelerated on how fast Lio is going to be comfortable with just eating him? They've bonded now. He's going to eat him.
Actually relaxing some - thinking about how maybe it's not such a bad thing to just enjoy being happy for a minute or two. He'll make out with him on this uncomfortable dumb little couch for a few minutes, but getting sick of it pretty quick. Taking charge, pulling back and dragging him after by the hand.]
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[He's less speaking to Lio, and more crying out the name, desperately, desperately sad. It piles on him, as he watches this horrible memory, feeling every ounce of Lio's helplessness. And his own memory is no better. It's his most treasured memory, in so many ways, the one he returned to time and time again. Kray saved him, he's here thanks to Kray. But now, he can only think of Lio and his friends, suffering and in pain. And that horrible, hate-filled look on the Gov's face as he sent him off to die.
Why did the man who saved him do such awful things? And does he still care so much? He lost everything except for this one thing he gained, that he could latch onto, and he's lost that now, too. And gained Lio, but it feels like he can't possibly deserve to cling to Lio that tightly, not when he's sat back and let such terrible things happen to him. He lets his tears roll openly down his cheeks and continues to hold him by the waist, against his chest, but his grip is loose.]
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He doesn't cry harder, though. He swallows back his tears, leaning into him.]
I'm going to help. With us together. . .
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I didn't know.
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Didn't know?
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About why you see him that way:
[ he won’t say his name though. ]
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[He swallows, considering. He sort of wants to protest - I don’t see him that way. But. Lio is trying to understand, right?]
Yeah. That’s how he first got famous - he was only a student, but he rescued me. And then his research started getting attention. Most people know about that even if they don’t put together that the kid was me, so I thought you also. . .
[He trails off, shaking his head.]
He kept up with me for a long time after that, too. He helped me get into training, and he recommended me for Burning Rescue. So I always saw him as my hero.
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You didn’t know. You are far from the only person he’s manipulated - you are one of the few brave enough to look the truth in the face.
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He nods.]
That’s why I didn’t want to hear it from you, even though I have fucking eyes and I saw the people you were with, what condition they were in.
I’m glad you told me anyway, though. I’m glad you tried.
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. . . I’m glad you’re here.
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[Twisting to kiss him, still holding his hand.]
And. . . I get it, too. Burning the city down. I get why you felt like you had to do that.
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When Galo says he understands, Lio sighs out - actual relief. That it’s actually good to finally be heard about that instead of lectured. Anyone who’s seen it seems suddenly scared of him. Acting disappointed he’d feel that depth of rage, that he’d threaten lives, that he’s supposed to be better. Hardly anyone had heard what he really meant - that he felt he had no other options. ]
I won’t— Unless i have to.
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Yeah. I mean, I still can't let you burn the city down, but that just means I'll have to come up with a better plan to free everybody. And I will.
[He's thought about this idea a lot recently. On the one hand, that awful experience of Kray brought him here angry and unwilling to consider people's arguments that some type of cruelty is the only good option. Those arguments only remind him of Kray, and he won't accept that. On the other hand, everyone here has had to make bad choices. He's starting to learn it's no use judging those choices if he can't think of a better one.]
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mods if you are reading this then you're nasty perverts DO NOT LOOK
Actually relaxing some - thinking about how maybe it's not such a bad thing to just enjoy being happy for a minute or two. He'll make out with him on this uncomfortable dumb little couch for a few minutes, but getting sick of it pretty quick. Taking charge, pulling back and dragging him after by the hand.]
Come.
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